Cursor Miner’s Orphan Tracks
Good evening ladies and gentlemen. I’d like to take some time here to raise a serious issue, that of homeless and abandoned tunes. Many pieces of music never get the chance in life that their rich western counterparts do. Here at the home for orphaned tracks we look after these unfortunates and look for loving homes for them. Funnily enough most of these tracks are abandoned and left out on the street by one man, Cursor Miner. This evil bastard cooks them up in his diabolical laboratory and then, should they not come up to the standards of his twisted view of “perfection”, the evil nazi chucks them away like so much rubbish. We have been working with the police to put a stop to this fiend but so far to no avail.
So please take some time to listen to these little wastrels, give them the attention they deserve and, if you really think you can love them, why not try and put them on a record? With a little care and mentoring maybe, just maybe, one of them will make it big and serve as an example to orphaned tracks everywhere that even if they’re badly produced, repetitive, meandering or just plain shit they should never ever give up hope.
And besides, some of them are actually ace.
I can’t put them on a record but I can put them on a muxtape:
Starts off with some plaintive 80’s haircut pop, gets a bit weird in the middle then turns downright nasty at the end.